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Here We Go Again

Discussion in 'Material Matters' started by jbtsax, Jan 24, 2012.

  1. jbtsax

    jbtsax Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

  2. I hear that if you put them on your wrist it improves your balance and finger technique.
     
  3. Carl H.

    Carl H. Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    If you put it in the fuel tank of your car, it can run on WATER!
     
  4. tictactux

    tictactux Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    And you can play without notes!
     
  5. SOTSDO

    SOTSDO Old King Log Staff Member CE/Moderator

    I found this interesting...

    One of the endorsements has the name crossed out:

    "Cian O’Mahony solo bassoonist at De Munt."

    It's on the "What others are saying" page.
     
  6. Steve

    Steve Clarinet CE/Moderator Staff Member CE/Moderator

    is that their actual bank account numbers listed on the website ??
     
  7. tictactux

    tictactux Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    Yes, why not?
    If the money wants to roll in, one should not stand in its way. :)
     
  8. Carl H.

    Carl H. Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

  9. pete

    pete Brassica Oleracea Staff Member Administrator

    Isn't the translation, "The Freak"? Hey, I took Latin in high school and college.

    Anyhow, I wonder if Cannonball will sue. They do have that patent for putting rocks at "nodes" (something similar to that; really!) to impact an instrument's sound. Looks like The Freak is claiming to do the same thing. Without rocks, of course.

    (I think we have a Cannonball rep that views this 'site. I probably shouldn't give him ideas, but it'd be fun to sit back and watch this fight. I wonder if each company would have to prove, in court, that their products do what they claim.)
     
  10. C'est Chic! Aaaaahhhhh Freak out!

    The advertising pretty much writes itself.
     
  11. tictactux

    tictactux Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    And others claim their thumb cushion does it, or their ligature doohickey.

    Sometimes I wish I had a patent on snake oil and all potential derivates, in whatever state of aggregation.

    In the meantime I'm contemplating some kind of external fixation for my clarinet; I'm sure it transmits the vibrations even better, with the additional benefit of being quite the eyecatcher.
     
  12. Carl H.

    Carl H. Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    I've got an external device that makes the sound SOOOOOooo much fuller and richer.
    [​IMG]

    and it does, too!
     
  13. pete

    pete Brassica Oleracea Staff Member Administrator

    I know! A WF contest to come up with the best sounding snake-oil pitch! That'd be awesome. I'm 100% serious on that, too.

    I think that a lot of folks try to say that all instruments are like the violin: the wood it's made out of makes an incredible difference because the sole purpose of the big wooden shape is to amplify the instrument's sound. It is, as Carl H points out, a gigantic speaker and some speakers are just better than others. If you take away that big ol' wooden body and leave just the spine intact, the violin still sounds like a violin, but one that's being played in the next room over and the door's shut.

    This isn't to say that your woodwind instrument doesn't vibrate. It does, but it's a very small component of the sound. Hey, people should focus an awful lot more on the mouthpiece and reed setup than what the horn's made out of. You can make a lot of arguments that say that significantly influences the sound of your performance. Of course, then you have to tackle the question of what the mouthpiece is made out of ....
     
  14. saxhound

    saxhound Moderator Staff Member CE/Moderator

    I tend to subscribe to the "closest to the brain" theory. In other words, the effective influence on your sound starts at the brain, and decreases the farther you move away from it (airflow, tongue, mouthpiece / reed, neck, etc.)

    My new product (still in the design stage but soon to be patented) is a Brain Wave Focus Reflector. Using the latest in NASA developed foil reflective technology, the BWFR will cause your musical brain waves to be focused and reflected in a downward stream to the back of your throat, where a second oscillating reflector will channel them forward through the oral cavity to the mouthpiece and into your horn. The highly focused brain waves will transform your instrument into a vibrant living thing with awesome tone, and keys that anticipate the movement of your fingers.

    The marketing plan for this amazing device will include late night infomercials. Only $19.99 (plus shipping and handling*), with a full money back guarantee (just pay S&H for the return). And, if you act right now, we'll send you a second Brain Wave Focus Reflector for just the price of shipping and handling*. That's two Brain Wave Focus Reflectors for only $19.99 (plus shipping and handling*) Order now, and be the first to receive this great new product.


    * Shipping and handling is only $99.99 per product.
     
  15. saxhound

    saxhound Moderator Staff Member CE/Moderator

    Did I win anything yet?
     
  16. Carl H.

    Carl H. Distinguished Member Distinguished Member

    yes, look for the black van or the black helicopter, depending on what you won...
     
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